Making the decision to have a child - it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking outside your body.
Elizabeth Stone

Friday, April 1, 2011

Info-session for a midwife (in Montreal)

23rd of March 2011 (15 weeks 5 days)

Since I found out I was pregnant, I knew I wanted a midwife. I called at 6 weeks to have appointment with a midwife and I thought I would get one right away because I was so early- WRONG. It takes forever for them to call you. I was disappointed because when I called, the receptionist told me that they would call me back at the end of the month (February) but they only ended up calling me back in the beginning of march after I called them back. Doesn’t really matter. I’m super happy that they have a place for me. 

As you might imagine, I did a lot of research on hospital, birthing center, homebirth, OB, midwives, etc. I feel like it’s my job as a future mom to look at all those options. So far, I was being followed by an AWESOME doctor. I mean, the dude is great (although he looks like my brother in law) but that’s just not what I want. It sucks because he’s right next door and everything but my heart is telling me to do something else. That “something” else is to have a midwife.  Why did I make that choice?

First, I want to have a good and understanding relationship with the person who will deliver my baby. Is it necessary? YES. For me it counts more than anything. I want to know her, I want her to know me. I want her to be able to tell if something is wrong or if I’m scared just by looking at my behaviour. Hmm, is that really possible? Well, consider this, each appointment is 45 minutes to one hour long. If you’ve been pregnant here in Montreal, you know that the time you spend at your GYN/ OB while pregnant is about 10-15 minutes. Okay, fine, my first appointment was a big 20 minutes. Why is it so short? Well, doctors do the essential; listen to heartbeat, to your pressure and weight you. If you have a question they will answer it and then good bye. Do I blame them? Not at all! I just had to take a look at the waiting room to see how many women were waiting just like I was. I wouldn’t want it to take 1 hour, there would be 20 women waiting after me (no joke. ) That being said, does it make “bad”? No! he checked every single thing that could have been wrong, he told me I was okay and actually he answered a few questions- the guy is great-just, not what I want. 

So, what does a midwife do that is so special? She takes the time to talk to you, to get to know you. She wants birth the way you want it. I am guaranteed that she’ll be the there for birth of that one of her colleagues (that I will meet previously)will be there. What does that change? A lot!!! I’ll trust her. I’ll want to listen to her, I know that she knows what she is talking about and I KNOW she will try to respect all my wishes. Not that it’s not doable in a hospital but try telling a bunch of doctors and students that you have never seen that you are not comfortable and that really you would like to take a snack or even to walk. Not doable- not here anyways. You are in labor, you lay down and you give birth Woman (yes that is exaggerated.) I’m not into that either way. I am thinking about giving birth at home or at a birthing center. I won’t know for sure until I meet with my midwife. I will write more about these birthing methods but right now I’ll just stick to this. So, let’s talk a bit more about midwives here in Montreal;
I am going to the birthing center of Pointe-Claire for my appointments. 

My midwife will be Marie but I have not met her yet. I am very excited and meeting her for the first time on the 7th of April. I went for an info-session last Tuesday. I thought it was at 8 am…turns out It was at 9 am! Oops. Anyways, we were 5 people; two couples and me. I was sad that the husband couldn’t make it, but he really couldn’t. A midwife gave us a little background on what they do and our options. It was really fast but really well done. We got to ask our questions at the end and the midwife was able to answer all of them. Then, she made us visit the center. It’s not super big but it’s just perfect. There are three rooms to give birth in. Two of them are quite alike but one is really different; it has a bathtub where you can give birth in. The other two rooms have simple bathtubs but you cannot give birth in them because the midwive cannot go all the way around. Makes sense. So, other than that, we took our first appointment and it’s “see you next time.” 

I feel happy about the choice I made and in the end, that’s all that matters. Don’t let anyone tell you how to birth- they won’t birth for you. Just be at peace with the choice you made no matter what that choice is.

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